Congress Finds the Light Switch

Congressional leadership loves transparency the way a raccoon loves a flashlight: beautiful in speeches, horrifying when it lands on the pile of wires. Around the Epstein files fight, the public complaint is simple enough to fit on a burned napkin: powerful people praised truth while treating inconvenient records like they were stored under a sleeping dragon named Procedure.

Public outrage is not elegant. It is gas-station coffee with a civic leaf blower, blasting through marble hallways while officials suddenly remember accountability was in the closet the whole time. Transparency should not require a crowd-funded clown horn, but if embarrassment makes the locks apologize, then congratulations: the clown horn has entered the record.